So tomorrow is the BIG day. I have an ultrasound scheduled for 3:15. I've opted to stay away from the main medical facilities in the area and made an appointment with a smaller independent imaging center in the city. My hope is that they don't ask too many questions, but in the event that they do, I'm hoping that by choosing a smaller, less assembly-line-type of place that maybe there will be less scrutinizing of my choice to not receive conventional treatment. A girl can dream, can't she?
And of course I'm a mess already. Mostly I'm nervous, but I'm also excited and maybe just a tiny bit scared. I wonder what it will show. I wonder if they'll tell me anything tomorrow or if I'll have to wait for the radiologist to send the results to my doctor. Has it grown? Has it shrunk? Has it spread? It's going to be a very long 18 hours.
I've given a lot of thought to what I might do if the results come back and it's measuring bigger than last time I had it checked in June. I pretty much came to the conclusion that it's a big waste of time and energy to devote my thinking to what "might be". I'll wait for the results and deal with "what is".
So keep me in your prayers and I'll update when I know something.
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